Okay, So You're The Star Quarterback
by Cola-Flavoured-Sherbet
Summary: When Mr. Schuester announces a 'Miscast' assignment, Dylan uses his own guilty pleasure to his advantage when one of his good friends gets hurt. OC based oneshot.


**Timeline: Set between 'The Substitute' and 'Furt'**

Dylan was talking with Quinn and Kurt when Mr. Schuester came in and immediately took out his board marker, writing the word 'MISCAST' on the board. Dylan looked to Quinn with interest before turning back to the director.

"What do you guys think of when you hear that word?" Mr. Schuester asked.

"Claire Danes in the 1998 film version of Les Miserables." Rachel started.

"George Clooney as Batman." Jack added on, Dylan nodded in agreement at that.

"Harvey Fierstein as a straight leading man." Kurt then said.

"Anyone else?" Mr. Schuester then asked before Finn and Puck said something about the Super Mario Brothers Movie that Dylan didn't even know existed until then.

"John Travolta in 'Pulp Fiction'." Artie said. Dylan looked to Artie at this, jaw dropping at the handicapped boy's choice.

"You take that back! More like Brad Pitt in 'Inglorious Basterds'." The blonde bit back before Mr. Schuester carried on.

"All very good examples," he said. "But, I have to wonder, could they have been better? Could there have been a way to save the things you just mentioned? I was watching a video on the internet over the weekend and saw something interesting." He said and then Dylan looked to him with interest.

"It was called Miscast. It featured different singers performing songs that they would normally not be allowed to sing. Think for a minute of a song you love, a show you love, something you want to be, but can't because you're a guy and not a girl, or the other way around," he thought of what else could prevent someone from attaining a goal, or you're too tall or too short, or for your sexual orientation. I remember reading an article where a reviewer for that said that an actor cast on a show about a glee club wasn't believable because the character was straight and the actor was gay." Mr. Schuester continued with Dylan's face contorted in disgust.

"That's bullsh-" Dylan started.

"Language." Mr. Schuester warned the dancer and his mouth clamped shut before Rachel and Kurt expressed their distaste.

"Now, I want you guys to think. If there was a show, a song, anything you wanted, but couldn't be in because of those, what would it be?" the Spanish teacher asked before a few of the members said their answers, including "Elphaba in Wicked" from Jack which both surprised and didn't surprise Dylan at the same time and then Puck said he liked Roberta Flack, which _did _surprise Dylan before Mr. Schuester spoke again,

"So, here's what I want you to do. I want you guys to find a song that you wouldn't normally sing." He said.

"Kind of like the last Mash-up assignment?" Quinn asked.

"Exactly. But, make it mean something special to you." Mr. Schuester answered and Dylan nodded, making an internal note to look through his iPod when he got home. He then looked to Quinn.

"You decided on what you're singing?" Dylan asked. Quinn raised an eyebrow.

"Do you really think I can do a Rachel and pull a song out of thin air?" the Cheerio asked. Dylan just shrugged

"You have done it before." Dylan stated and Quinn nodded at that.

"As a matter of fact, yes I have." The girl replied and Dylan's ear slowly moved towards the singer, Quinn taking that as asking "What is it, oh great one?"

"Like I'm going to tell you!" Quinn asked, laughing and Dylan pouted.

"Pretty please." The boy asked in a childish voice and Quinn could only smile, pushing at the dancer's shoulder.

**0000000000**

Quinn ended up singing Five For Fighting's 'Superman', which turned out sounding incredible. And so did everyone else. His personal highlights were Quinn with 'Superman', Jack singing 'I'm Not That Girl', Sam singing Britney Spears' 'Everytime' with Mr. Schuester saying that this one Britney song would be an exception, Mitchell singing Sara Bareilles' 'King Of Anything', Finn belting out Kiki Dee's 'I've Got The Music In Me', Puck with Roberta Flack's 'The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face' and Santana singing Downstrait's 'I Came To Play'. They all sounded amazing.

Now the only 2 performers who hadn't performed were Brittany and himself and, somehow, they ended up in Brittany's very colorful bedroom discussing song choices.

"I don't really sing anything so would any song do?" Brittany asked the boy stood opposite her as she sat on the side of the bed.

"I don't think so Britt. I mean, you can't do Britney Spears because that would be too obvious and Sam did 'Everytime'." Dylan replied and Brittany nodded.

"This is hard." Brittany then said, gazing at the boy.

"I know. I can't find a song either." Dylan said before his phone rang.

_This is our situation, and we're happy to be here_

He slipped the Blackberry out of his pocket before seeing it was his mom.

"Hey, mom…I'm just at Brittany's…yes, mom…MOM!...yeah, it was a little much!...I'll probably home at about 7:30 at the latest…alright, see you later mom…bye." Dylan said before putting the phone down.

"What was that song that's your ringtone?" Brittany asked, motioning to Dylan's phone who looked to it and smiled.

"It's a song by this British rock band called 'Not Advised'. My ex girlfriend Jenn had saw them at a festival when she was in England on holiday and she recommended them." Dylan said and Brittany smiled, trying to ignore the fact that is ex recommended them.

"I want to do that song for glee." Brittany said and Dylan quirked an eyebrow before realizing that it could actual match the assignment requirements. Brittany's repertoire was just pop songs and 'Not Advised' was definitely rock. It could actually work.

"Yeah. I think I can arrange that." Dylan said and the two blondes smiled.

**0000000000**

"Alright. Who's next to perform their 'miscast' song?" Mr. Schuester asked, entering the choir room and Brittany put her hand up.

"Brittany. The floor is yours." Will said and Brittany smiled in reply before standing up, Dylan close behind as he set up his electric guitar.

"Okay. So I didn't even know this song existed until Dylan's phone sang it and I liked it's voice so I wanted to pay tribute." Brittany said and everyone looked confused before Brittany nodded to Dylan who started up the song before the drums and Brittany came in, singing with unbelievable amounts of power.

_Well you can take it or leave it, either way its fine_

_And I'd love to say we care but we got better things in mine_

_Well you can fake it or mean it, just look me in the eye_

_And tell me honestly how you are worthy of our time_

_This is our situation, and we're happy to be here_

_I wouldn't change this place for anything_

_This is our situation, and we're happy to be here_

_I wouldn't change this place for anything_

_Sometimes wish I could turn back time_

_Soften up and draw a line_

_And see you cross it, unaware of what's on the other side_

_Well we'll be waiting, to shrug off every lie_

_Your lips are spilling, we'll catch you every time_

_We'll catch you everytime_

_This is our situation, and we're happy to be here_

_I wouldn't change this place for anything_

_This is our situation, and we're happy to be here_

_I wouldn't change this place for anything_

_Well it's a long way up and it's further down_

_Gonna touch the sky before I hit the ground_

_Well it's a long way up and it's further down_

_I'm gonna touch the sky_

_This is our situation, and we're happy to be here_

_I wouldn't change this place for anything_

_This is our situation, and we're happy to be here_

_I wouldn't change this place for anything_

_This is our situation, and we're happy to be here_

_I wouldn't change this place for anything_

The song ended with an abruptly ceased guitar chord from Dylan and everyone applauded the Cheerio with her performance. Mr. Schuester stood up, laughing.

"Wow, Brittany. Where have you been keeping that voice?" he asked.

"I didn't even know I had it until Dylan's phone rang and he taught me the song." Brittany said and everyone looked to Dylan.

"Wow, Dylan. I'm impressed. And thank you for introducing to this powerful voiced Brittany." The teacher said.

"Told you I'm more talented than you all." Brittany said, smiling before sitting down. Mr. Schuester then looked to Dylan.

"Alright, Dylan. You're the last one." He said and Dylan looked down, scratching the back of his head.

"Actually, Mr. Schuester. I don't have a song prepared. I really can't find a song that I wouldn't normally sing. Maybe give me a couple of weeks?" Dylan asked, a pleading look in his striking blue eyes. Mr. Schuester could only sigh.

"Alright. You got two weeks but you're gonna have to participate in the other assignments too while you prepare for this." The teacher replied and Dylan nodded before sitting down.

**0000000000  
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**2 weeks later**

Dylan was walking down the hallway. They had just won Sectionals…well, they were tied with Dalton but they were still going to Regionals and Dylan couldn't be more proud. That was when he saw a distraught looking Rachel Berry stood in the hallway, head in hands and audible sobs escaping her that could be heard from halfway up the hallway. Dylan was at the girl's side in a heartbeat.

"What's wrong, Rachel?" Dylan asked, placing gentle hands around the girl's shoulder.

"Finn broke up with me…because I made out with Puck…at least I didn't lie when he lied for months about him and Santana." Rachel said before Dylan pulled her in for a hug.

"It's okay. It's gonna be okay. It'll be hard for you to get over him but trust me, you will in time." Dylan said and Rachel could only tighten the hug. Dylan returned it before a light bulb lit in his head and he smiled.

"In fact, I think I know a way to put him in his place." Dylan said before Rachel looked up to him.

**0000000000**

After everyone performed 'Dog Days Are Over', Dylan raised his hand to Mr. Schuester.

"Mr Schue! I have my 'Miscast' song ready." He called out and Will smiled.

"Alright. Show us what you got." The teacher replied and Dylan smiled before getting ready and the drum and guitar introduction started before Dylan sang into a microphone, playing with the stand that stood beneath it.

_I've known a few guys who thought they were pretty smart_

_But you've got being right down to an art_

_You think you're a genius-you drive me up the wall_

_You're a regular original, a know-it-all_

_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special_

_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else_

_Okay, so you're glee club captain_

_That don't impress me much_

That got Finn shifting in his seat and Rachel and Dylan smiled in satisfaction before he carried on with the song.

_So you got the brain but have you got the touch_

_Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright_

_But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night_

_That don't impress me much_

_I never knew a guy who carried a mirror in his pocket_

_And a comb up his sleeve-just in case_

_And all that extra hold gel in your hair oughtta lock it_

_'Cause Heaven forbid it should fall outta place_

_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special_

_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else_

_Okay, so you're the star quarterback_

_That don't impress me much_

Now Finn looked extremely nervous. In fact, Dylan could swear he could see dark pools of sweat forming in his underarms over his green polo shirt.

_So you got the looks but have you got the touch_

_Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright_

_But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night_

_That don't impress me much_

_You're one of those guys who likes to shine his machine_

_You make me take off my shoes before you let me get in_

_I can't believe you kiss your car good night_

_C'mon baby tell me-you must be jokin', right!_

_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special_

_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else_

_Okay, so you can lie about sleeping with Santana while Rachel told the truth_

One captain's eyes widened while the other's mouth curled into a wicked smile, mirroring the one Dylan was giving her.

_That don't impress me much_

_So you got the moves but have you got the touch_

_Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright_

_But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night_

_That don't impress me much_

_You think you're cool but have you got the touch_

_Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright_

_But that won't keep me warm on the long, cold, lonely night_

_That don't impress me much_

_Okay, so what do you think you're Jim Morrison or something?_

_Ooh oh o__h_

_That don't impress me much!_

Dylan could only smirk wickedly at Finn sitting awkwardly in his seat while the others stood to applaud him. Dylan knew Jack was applauding because it made Rachel happy and Dylan accepted that, bowing before speaking into the microphone.

"I admit. I love Shania Twain. Happy?" he said, smiling and the others whooped in reply.

**0000000000**

**Songs used are 'The Red Light Situation' by Not Advised and 'That Don't Impress Me Much' by Shania Twain**

**Just a little fun oneshot to do and it was quite fun to write, especially altering the lyrics to ****'That Don't Impress Me Much' because I hated the way Finn reacted about Rachel and Puck in 'Special Education'. At least she told the truth!**

**I would like to thank Soulless Warlock for letting me use the idea of chapter 15 ****'I'm Not That Girl' in his story 'Sing A Little Scene Of Me'. Go read it, it's awesome.**

**I was working on a crackship fic but that is currently on hiatus until I complete 'He's Alive'. The 'Rumours' chapter should be up by Tuesday seeing as it airs in the UK on Monday and I will have time seeing as I am on study leave as of tomorrow, giving me more time to revise for my exams…I mean write more chapters…kidding, I'm doing both of course! :)**

**Feel free to review!**


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